Monday, May 23, 2011

Beyoncé takes it to the next level

My angels reunite

There was a lot riding of Beyoncé's performance at today's Billboard Awards in Las Vegas. It's no secret that "Run The World (Girls)" is the love-it-or-hate-it hot mess of the decade and the timing and legitimacy of her special Millennium Award was questioned by the usual crowd of pressed troublemakers. And while I'll admit that the timing was suspect, there's no denying that she well and truly deserved the award. It's basic math. When Billboard released their artists of the decade countdown in back 2009 Beyoncé came in 4th, while Destiny's Child placed 9th. Add the two together and you have the biggest star of the new millennium. Which admittedly is only 11 years old. But still!

So you rock up to receive a dubious award in front of the all your main rivals at a time when your video is being derided as National Geographic porn and your single is being outsold by Selena Gomez. I guess there are two options. Go with something tried and tested, perhaps throw in a couple of verses of "Halo" to remind people that you can sing, or stand by your wacky chorusless wonder and snatch every wig in the building with a flawless display of artistry that hasn't been seen since Michael Jackson did the moonwalk at the Grammys. In case you haven't seen the video - Beyoncé went with option number two.

Words can not describe how breathtaking her performance was. Dancing alone for most of the song against mind-bending projections that appeared to merge dimensions, the 29-year-old superstar redefined what it means to be a pop star. Bey looked amazing, worked the stage like a master, incorporated new technology, sounded brilliant, danced like a mad woman and whipped her hair until I thought her weave would fall off. There's a whole slew of canny ladies out there with Max Martin on speed dial but Beyoncé proved yet again that when it comes to raw talent, she is the only complete package in popular music.

Almost as exciting as the main event were the pre-performance testimonials and Bey's acceptance speech. It blows my mind that Honey B has the First Lady pimping out her hood anthem at random award ceremonies. That would be like Nancy Reagan rocking up to the MTV Music Awards in the 80s to praise Madonna! I loved hearing trannylicious Tina Knowles, her shady dad Matthew, poor Solange, Stevie Wonder, Babyface, The-Dream, Barbra Streisand and Lady Gaga talk about Beyoncé's stunning contribution to music. It was more than I could get my head around in one viewing.

And the acceptance speech was better yet. I cried when I saw Michelle Williams and Miss Kelly overcome with emotion. Is a brief Destiny's Child reunion too much to ask for now that K Row is a hitmaker in her own right and 'Shell has a high profile job cleaning toilets in Houston? And what about Bey thanking original members LeToya and Latavia! Those pressed bitches now have nothing left to complain about, so I guess that's the last we'll ever hear from them. It was sad that Bey forgot to thank Farrah Franklin but I think I'm the only DC fan with a soft spot for that trainwreck so I guess it's all good.

Here is the best performance you will see until the next time Beyoncé lifts the bar. Take a deep breath and prepare to be blown away.

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